How to Reduce Stress for the New Year
If you’re anything like most other autism moms, sometimes it feels like life is taking you for a crazy ride. Okay, let’s be honest – it feels that way most of the time! There’s always a meltdown to calm, a new sensory issue to figure out, or another regression to face. It can leave us feeling unaccomplished, disappointed, helpless, and just plain exhausted. Sounds fun, right? (*rolls eyes) No way! So let’s follow these tips to take back control of our lives, reduce stress, and make this new year the best year ever!
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Basic Ways to Reduce Stress
We can all narrow down our stress points quite a bit. One of mine is dishes. If the dishes aren’t done before bedtime, it ruins my next morning, which pretty much ruins the day. But that’s way more specific than we need to be right now. There are a few keys to helping reduce stress, in general, and that’s what you need to focus on. Taking care of yourself, getting organized, and maintaining routines are the best ways to reduce stress. Sure, it will take some lifestyle changes and some discipline, but you want a better life, right? That’s what I thought. So let’s get started!
1) Get organized
This doesn’t mean tidy up your office, although that’s not a bad idea. But for now, we’re talking about organizing your life. Stop letting life happen to you, and you take charge of your days. How is that even possible, when there are so many therapy appointments, daily stresses, and unforeseen circumstances to deal with? Well, it starts with being intentional.
You have my permission to go splurge (a little) on a cute new planner if you must. (I love this one, which states “Best year ever” on the cover – it’s a nice reminder!) Throw in some fun pens, or start a bullet journal. Whatever it’s going to take to get you motivated, do it!
Set goals
Set aside some time to think about what you want your life to look like. Be realistic, of course. Even though your child requires much more assistance than typical children, you still have an identity, and you can still live your life. So set some goals.
What are your goals for the new year? Maybe you want to get your finances under control, get a new job certification, or become a healthier and happier version of you. Maybe you want to gain more knowledge about autism spectrum disorders, because this is still pretty new to you – if so, check out my autism beginner’s eBook, and it will have you on your way!
Whatever your goals are, write them down! Then, make a simplified daily or weekly checklist, to help you have a continued sense of accomplishment. I have yearly, monthly, weekly, and daily goals, because it helps me to check off those daily boxes to see I’m really doing something!
Wake up before your kids
I really can’t stress this point enough. It’s the one biggest game-changer I can recommend, because it allows you the necessary time to do important things like relax, think, set goals, make a schedule, have alone time, and focus on positives.
Waking up before your kids gives you a little bit of time to take charge of the day, before it runs away with you.
I am as far as you can possibly get from being a morning person. I loathe mornings. But waking up super early has completely changed our little world. I am a different person when I have started my day right, than when I wake up to two adorable tiny people jumping on me.
If you’re not a morning person, it may be a big adjustment, but I promise you it will be worth it. Bonus points if you can check off some items from your daily goals before the kids wake! I’ve turned it into a little game, and it’s great motivation!
Make a schedule
This is another big one. Having a schedule helps you to get organized and stay organized. When you have some quiet time (it may be at 2:00 am, like me!), sit down and make a simple schedule. Jot down events that happen regularly, and fill in the blanks around them.
If your child has weekly therapies, or goes to school, those things should be penciled in first. Then decide what needs to happen with the rest of the day. Include meal times, bath time, bedtime routines, play time, and other daily habits.
Having a schedule and sticking to a routine makes the week flow much smoother. It gives you more control over your life, and helps reduce stress for your children as well. We all thrive with routines. If you haven’t already, begin using a visual schedule to help keep your children informed about what’s next.
Organizing your life puts control back in your hands, and in turn, reduces stress and anxiety all around. When Mama feels like she’s accomplishing something, everyone else is happier too.
Take care of yourself
This is probably the hardest thing for special needs moms. My health went down the tubes a few years ago because of all the stress. I had a major health scare, which caused me to reevaluate and get my priorities in line. You won’t do your kids any good if you’re dead…and that’s no joke. With the constant stress of special needs parenting, we have no choice but to take care of ourselves.
But how?! That’s the million dollar question, right? I used to say the same thing. As a single mom working from home with two autistic children, I don’t get a break very often! So I definitely understand.
The biggest piece of advice I can offer is one we already went over: wake up before your kids! Another hour of sleep sure sounds glorious, but it will cost you. Wake up a little early and have some time to yourself.
Spend 20 minutes doing a fun YouTube dance workout, sip a whole cup of coffee uninterrupted (sounds dreamy, right?!), make a healthier breakfast, read some Scriptures or encouraging quotes, enjoy a hot shower, journal, fix your hair, whatever – just spend some time doing something that will benefit you. Then you will be more prepared to take on the day. Check out this post for some great ideas on how to relax in 20 minutes.
Even if you have to wake up during the middle of the night to have an hour to yourself once a week, do it. Try to get decent sleep (here are some helpful tips on getting your kids to sleep too!), slip fruits and veggies into your diet, take vitamins, allow yourself to relax on a regular basis, and stay hydrated. Connect with other moms, use a journal, track every little success, and focus on the things you can control. Those are just a few bits of wisdom that will help you reduce stress this year.
You’ve got this, Mama! I hope you’re more motivated now, and that you’re ready to have a less stressful and more productive and rewarding year!
Miracle Morning for the win! I do that too. Everyone should read that book(miracle morning)!
Definitely checking that one out, Dave! Thanks for the recommendation!
As a fellow special needs mama, I really appreciate this post! Schedules and waking up early have been huge for my sanity, and though I sometimes struggle to make it happen, self-care is way more important than I used to think! Great post.
I am an organized person which helps so much. I’m trying to wake up before kids. Taking care of myself is one thing I need to work on. Sometimes it just gets pushed aside. Thank you Rachel from Explore Kid Talk
Yes to taking care of yourself! It is so important! I am not a mum but always remind this point to mine. It is key to be at your best so you can give your best! Happy New Year!
Happy New Year, Lydia! I love how you put it: be at your best so you can give your best!
These are all great tips! The one I struggle with most is waking up before my kids. But I’m going to make that a priority!
That’s my biggest struggle too! It’s one of my main goals for this year – to CONSISTENTLY wake up before the kids!
Although I’m not a special needs mom I still find value in what you suggested! Thanks so much for sharing your world and your heart to help make mama lives easier.
You bet, Michelle! I’m so glad you’ve found value here too – these tips definitely work wonders for mamas in general! 💙
Great tips! Even as a non-mom, I think some of these ideas are important. I love my physical planner because it keeps me on track and less frazzled.
-Lauren
Lauren, I’m right there with you! I can’t handle the apps and digital stuff when it comes to planning – I LOVE my paper planner!
These are great tips! Getting organized helps so much! I love mornings when I get up before the little ones! Happy New Year!
Happy New Year! I’m looking forward to a great one!
Special needs + chronic mom here…getting organized is key. I’m still working on digging out after 20+ years of 4 kids and homeschooling.
Wow, Marya, you are my hero! That’s awesome! And you’re so right – getting organized is definitely the key!
This is such an interesting idea! I love time to myself in the morning but don’t always make the effort. This shows the importance of doing so. Thanks!!
This post is packed full of wonderful gold nuggets of advice! 🙂 A clean kitchen after every meal makes this mama happy! I love my planner too, and it definitely keeps me organized! I couldn’t agree more about waking up before the children. The day runs so much more smoothly!
Thanks, Kristen! Oh yes, I would love a clean kitchen after every meal too! It sounds like you’re pretty organized and intentional! 😄